Affable Alf by C.J. Dennis

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Has he magnetised the people? Has he over-persuaded them?  I recognise his marvellous gifts of speech; they are, I think, beyond compare.  I have heard Mr. George Turner say that Mr. Deakin has sometimes convinced him by the way he looked at him. - Senator 'Siah Symon.

Have you heard the inscrutable mutable Alf,
The mannerly man with the silvery tongue?
               Ever loquacious,
               Smiling and gracious.
Loud in the land have his praises been sung.
He has magnetised all with his eloquent speakin' --
The Great oratorical oracle, Deakin.
His somewhat sporadical radical speeches
Have over-persuaded us all, and his style --
               His easy urbanity
               Tickles our vanity;
And we are won by his affable smile.
He captivates all with his eloquence sinister,
Does the persuasive, evasive Prime Minister.
His fine pyrotechnical technical phrases,
His grand perorations, exordiums, too,
               'Spite their obscurity,
               Are of a purity
And of a quality equalled by few,
And he knows all the tricks of portfol-i-o seekin',
That clever illusionist, fusionist Deakin.
But, beware of mysterious serious Alf.
His weird cabalistical, mystical call --
               His impetuosity,
               Plus his verbosity,
Acts like a strange anaesthetic on all.
But, when you get over the charm of his speakin',
You'll come to a frangible, tangible Deakin.
You'll find an accessible cessible man,
With political frailties many as most o' them.
               'Spite his euphonical
               Gifts histrionical,
Critics political point, to a host o' them.
He is but a man after all and a weak 'un --
A most, inexcusable fusible Deakin.
His most omnifarious various views
He'll alter to suit the occasion that pays him,
               Though lacking in clarity.
               Any disparity
In his fused following's powerless to daze him.
Regarded apart from his eloquent speakin',
O, what a lamentable, rentable Deakin!

First published in The Bulletin, 22 July 1909

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This page contains a single entry by Perry Middlemiss published on July 22, 2013 7:31 AM.

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