The prize lists for the South Street competitions at Ballarat, to be held in October next, total £1,400; £150 is to be given for vocal and instrumental music, and £170 for elocution. - Melb Age
Oh, teach me how to elocute,
Oh, teach me how to say
The boy stood on the burning deck
In strictly proper way;
Oh, teach me how to clutch my heart,
And roll my glittering eye,
That I may wail with all my might
The Leper's fearful cry.
Oh, train my voice to sing the songs
Of how the swallows fly,
And teach me how to tell the world
How Tosti said "Good-bye";
Oh, let me learn by day and night
The way to calm those fears;
I want to understand aright
Just how to dry those tears.
Oh, teach me how to do my hair,
That I may win a prize,
And how to wear my spectacles
Before my bright-blue eyes:
For much depends, I've heard them say,
Upon the clothes you wear,
They say it's half the victory
To dress yourself with care.
And when I've proved victorious,
And by the telegraph
My fame has spread, oh, hasten then
To take my photograph;
Oh, teach me how to rest my chin
Upon my shapely hand,
That in the picture I may look
A credit to the land.
First published in The Gadfly, 2 May 1906
Author reference sites: C.J. Dennis, Austlit, Australian Dictionary of Biography, Australian Poetry Library
See also.
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