Shaw? Pshaw! by C.J. Dennis

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In declaring that the King is the best speaker in the realm, whose broadcasts create loyalty, Mr Bernard Shaw declares: "If he (the King) delivered a single broadcast with an 'Oxford' accent his people would rise up that very day and proclaim a republic."

Not reahly?  Oh Ai say!  What priceless rot!
   Suahly such uttah nonsense can't be true?
The King not speak ouah culchahed tongue?  What, what?
   Whai?  Ai've been to Oxford; but Ai do.
Ai've spoken Oxford now foah quaite a whaile --
Ever since Ai achieved mai latest stayle.

Ai mean to say -- these statements seem to me
   Quaite teeasonable, if you undahstand
Mai meaning.  And, bai jove! there seems to be
   A hint of something rathah undahhand
In statements that this Shaw straives to uphold --
A rabid Bolshevik!  So ai've been told.

This fellah Shaw!  Ai've nevah read his traipe,
   And never want to.  Balley lot of rot!
Ai always hev dislaiked that common taipe
   Who sneer at culchah.  Why the boundah's got 
The priceless nerve to claim that loyaltay
Comes thro' rough speaking bai His Majestay!

Would he infer Ai've wasted all mai taime,
   Giving mai accent just the propah ring,
To learn that Royaltay has no such aim?
   By gad, sir!  It's an insult to ouah King!
Would Shaw infer that he has let us down?
No!  Definitely, no!  The man's a clown! 

First published in The Herald, 27 January 1934

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This page contains a single entry by Perry Middlemiss published on January 27, 2013 8:25 PM.

A Peaceable Man. (As Told to the Bench) by C.J. Dennis was the previous entry in this blog.

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