Poem: "D--N!" by W.T. Goodge

Mr. Archer: Withdraw the amendment!
Mr. J.C.L. Fitzpatrick: Perhaps the hon. member will do us the favor of withdrawing from the House.
Mr. Archer: I wish the hon. member would withdraw -- he is a damned nuisance, anyway! Mr. Speaker: I have repeatedly asked the hon. member for Burwood to discontinue interrupting, and he has not taken the slightest notice.
An Hon. Member: He said "Damn!" Mr. Speaker.
-N.S.W. Hansard

Oh, wasn't it a fearful thing
   When Archer murmured "D---!"?
I'm filled with pain and wondering --
   Indeed I really am!
And so (I'm nearly sure) are you;
It was a dreadful thing to do --
It thrills a person through and through
   When Archer murmurs "D---!"

Another tale I'll tell to you
   Of one who murmured "D---!"
There was a certain Bishop who
   Contrived to miss his tram;
And though he could not curse his fate
(For Bishops have to keep sedate)
A layman, who was also late,
   Ejaculated, "D---!"

That bishop shook that layman's hand!
   (The hand was like a ham.)
That bishop smiled with pleasure and
   His eyes with water swam!
"My friend, how kind that was of you
To say what I was thinking, too,
But could not say! It wouldn't do
   For ME to murmur 'D---!'"

So pressmen in the House at night
   (They must not call out "D---!")
Who have to write the blatherskite,
   As silent as a clam,
And listen to the dreary crew
Who want to talk till all is blue
Will bless the name of Archer who
   Breathed out that hearty "D---!"

First Published in The Bulletin, 3 September 1903

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This page contains a single entry by Perry Middlemiss published on August 4, 2007 9:20 AM.

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