Jock M'Pherson was a person who was boastful in conversin',
   But respectable and ponderous and dignified withal!
Con M'Carty was a party who was something of a smarty,
   And beside the big M'Pherson looked particularly small;
   But Cornelius M'Carty, he was artful, after all!

When Cornelius M'Carty thought M'Pherson was his dart, he Made a wager he could carry him a mile along the track; Which, considering M'Pherson was a very weighty person, Was a risky undertaking for M'Carty's little back. But Cornelius protested it depended on the knack!
"Take yer coat off!" called M'Carty, and M'Pherson gave a start, he Hadn't bargained for proceedings the reverse of dignified! But he felt he had the best of the arrangement. "Take yer vest off!" Said M'Carty; and M'Pherson very graciously complied. It was in the private parlor, and the crowd was all outside.
"Take yer boots off!" said M'Carty in a cheerful tone and hearty, But M'Pherson he objected that the crowd would see his toes. Said M'Carty, "See, M'Pherson, there ain't any sense in cursin', Take yer boots off, I don't reckon to be handicapped with those! I am not the sort of juggins you apparently suppose!"
This M'Pherson's wrath arouses. "But," said he, "I'll keep me trousers!" "Not a trouser!" said M'Carty, "or to me the wager goes. The conditions you're reversin'; I will carry you, M'Pherson, But the wager doesn't say a blessed word about yer clothes!" That was how the small M'Carty had M'Pherson by the nose!

"W. T. Goodge"
Bulletin, 10 December 1898, p18

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