Works in the Herald 1937

Doctor Dunstan Brewster, of Swindon, England, delcares that holding hands in pictures is good for young people, especially those suffering from mental affections, so long as putting heads together to whisper sweet nothings does not inconvience others in the audience.

Excuse ....
   Eh? I didn't understand.
Oh, yes. Of course; your hand.
Forgive my ignorance.
I thought that, possibly, some slight mischance --
Oh, yes, I like your hand.
Mind? Not at all.
It's grand!
So very soft and small.
Rather a lark,
Here in the dark.
Rather a cosy place...
Oh yes; I saw your face
When you came in ...
But wait. The picture's going to begin.

I beg your pardon? Me?
   Closer? Ah, yes; I see.
Our heads together, so?
I don't object at all. Oh, dear me, no!
But do you think the people there behind
Will mind?
That stout dame at the back. Think we have shocked her?
What's that you say? What doctor?
You mean -- Oh; you are taking his advice?
I see. It's very nice.
But I'm afraid I hardly undertsnad ...
It is so soft and smooth, your hand.
And I could go on holding it like this,
With not a thought amiss,
Until the tardy sands of time,
In dreams sublime,
Ran out ...
I wonder what the picture's all about?

   Don't talk so loud!
This surly and unsentimental crowd
Inclines to snarling ...
Whisper. You say you've read
That some wise doctor said
This sort of thing was good?
A clever man. I'm sure he understood
Good for affections? heart of mine, how true!
A proper sort of man. He knew, he knew ...
Leave your dear hand in mine,
This is divine!

How sweet upon affection here to sup,
   So, in the dark like this ...
Hey! Break away! The lights are going up!
Excuse me, miss.
I mean -- I'm hardly used --
Perhaps we'd better wait
Until some later date
I mean --
Till after we have been --

Herald, 25 March 1937, p6

Copyright © Perry Middlemiss 2008-11