Works in the Herald 1934
THE PATIENCE OF PLUVIUS JUPE
"Long years have I listened," said Jupiter Pluvius -
Careless tho' even to suicide move he us.
(Cumbersome rhymes, as I'm ready to grant you;
But cut out the cackle and hark to me can't you?)
"Long years have I listened to pleas and complaining
Of droughts when it's dry and of floods when it's raining.
All hurried and harried, while doing my best,
I have struggled to serve you at human behest.
I've hearkened to that one and hearkened to this one,
Neurotic'ly nervous in case I should miss one.
But, in striving to satisfy all men, my name
Becomes mud; and I'm badgered with all sorts of blame,
Till I'm fed up with being humanity's dupe;
So I'm going my way," said Pluvius, Jupe.
"Moaning and groaning," said Jupiter Pluvius -
Heedless tho' absolute ingrates now prove he us.
(Again I will grant you the rhyming is rocky,
But try it yourself, and you won't be so cocky) -
"Moaning and groaning and yelling for rain -
It has worried me so when I hear you complain
That of late I am losing much adipose tissue,
So - under below, there! I've got a fair issue
Of pretty wet stuff, and I'm going to spill it
If needed or not; but because I now will it.
All over the country I'm going to chuck it.
So - under below! I'm upending the bucket;
And blame me no more if you're all in the soup;
For I'm sick of your snivelling," said Pluvius, Jupe.
Herald, 29 October 1934, p6