Works in the Herald 1933
Listen, Elaine. Tho' I'm not mad on racing,
I like a little flutter now and then;
But I maintain you would not be disgracing
The family, or look like some old hen
If you just wore -- Now, just a minute, please!
That pinkish frock -- No, wait! Let me explain.
That pinkish frock with spots -- You wouldn't freeze!
You've got your furs. Aw, listen, please, Elaine!
Now, look. We've twenty pounds. Don't let us quarrel.
(Surely we can be sane and quite grown-up).
If you take most of that, what of the "moral"
That Percy Podgrass gave us for the Cup?
Of course he's sure to win. What are vain dresses
Compared -- My dear! I did not call you vain!
Nor selfish either. Gosh! What married messes
Start over clothes, and -- Listen, please, Elaine.
We're partners, aren't we? Well, then, listen, darling.
We might discuss this calmly, don't you think?
Now! Please be sensible ... I am not snarling!
Rubbish! Of course, you do look nice in pink.
I always thought that spotted pink looked dandy,
And comfy, too. Supposing it should rain.
Nice sight you'd look in -- What's it called -- organdie ...
I was not wishing -- Listen, please! Elaine!
Women just dress to spite some other tabby.
Who said you were a cat? One moment, pet.
Of course, I wouldn't have my wife look shabby.
Take what you need. We'll make a smaller bet ...
Eight -- ten -- twelve quid! Whew! Not much left for betting.
Still, just a flutter and expenses ... What?
Listen, Elaine. What could I be forgetting?
Hat? Stockings? Shoes to match? ... Here!
Take the lot!
Herald, 31 October 1933, p25