Works in the Herald 1931

Yesterday a prisoner, on being asked why he ran away when being taken to prison, replied, "I never liked the place."

Some'ow I never liked the place.
   I couldn't tell you why.
They gives their guest fair food an' rest,
   And the tariff isn't high.
And they're most attentive night an' day,
Whenever you go there to stay.

Their invites is so pressing like; The host, 'e loves you so That when they've got you on the spot They 'ates to let you go. An' yet, I've always noticed when You leave they don't say, "Come again."
Yet, some day, when I least expect, An' ain't inclined to go, One of their cops in on me drops, An' simply won't take "No." An', at sich times, it don't seem nice To let 'em see your prejudice.
A bloke 'as other things to do, An' other spots to go. If they don't agree to let me be, An' wouldn't press me so, Then gladly, if they didn't mind, I'd go there when I felt inclined.

Herald, 31 January 1931, p6

Copyright © Perry Middlemiss 2002-03