Works in the Herald 1931
When he was quite a small boy, Frank
   Was fond of useful playthings;
So he was given a toy bank
   That he might learn the way things
Were done in the financial world;
So, on the playroom floor he curled,
   Tho' short of pence, and had great dreams
    Of wonderful financial schemes.

No lack of pennies grieved small Frank, He simply took some paper And posted slips into his bank - A cunning childish caper. And soon he found that, with due care, He could become a millionaire. A happy child. And all day He sang himself this little song:
"If papers I have not enough - Each standing for a penny - I take it out and tear the stuff, And then I've twice as many. And if my bank's not full, why then I tear them all tn two again. So all day long I tear and sing And grow as rich as anything."
In course of time Frank learned to walk And his perambulations Led to strange fields; he learned to talk And made some fine orations. He left his school, and went to work; He sought the vote, and stood for Bourke And, being voluble, was sent For years and years to Parliament.
But, tho' he grew in many ways And wondrously developed His childish money complex stayed Until it had enveloped His whole attention. So that, when Acute depression comes to men, And things financial all go wrong, He sings again his little song:
"When lack of money troubles brew For any stricken nation You simply tear your notes in two By process of inflation. And of this does not serve, why then You just divide them up again Until, with new financial health, The whole land overflows with wealth."

Herald, 17 March 1931, p6

This is number 12 in Dennis's Political Personalities series.
The "Frank" referred to above is Frank Anstey (see also "Frank") who was a strong advocate of nationalising Australia's banks and was a major force behind the creation of the Commonwealth Bank.

Copyright © Perry Middlemiss 2002