Works in the Bulletin 1912
Now Percival Gregory Grandison-Lee
   He came of a fine old stock.
His sire was an eminent K.C.B,
But Percival never appeared to be
   A chip off that shrewd old block.
In spite of the strain
He was weak of brain,
   Though a jolly good fellow was he.
And, to tell the truth,
In his gilded youth
   His manner of living was free.

Now Percival's father, the elder Lee, Aspired to the House of Lords; So he earnestly sought for the s. d. Becoming a prominent guinea-pig, he Was chairman of numerous Boards. But the game was rash, And there came a smash, And he perished of felo-de-se. And up to his neck, In the subsequent wreck Was Percival Grandison-Lee.
So Percy resigned from the King's armee; He couldn't maintain the style. And, after a harrowing period, he Was faced by the spectre of bank-rupt-cee, His schedule he had to file. He smiled through court Like a hardy sport, But he sorrowed in privacee; For an easy job For a hard-up nob Isn't growing on every tree.
He touched then for tenners so frequentlee That the friends of Lee, deceased, A length procession of loans could see, And they whispered to one of the Ministree As Percival's plans increased. Thus they shipped him off As a gilded toff On the staff of a high grandee To earn his bread As a figurehead - And a Governor's A.D.C.
In that country of democrats o'er the sea The cream of Society's cream They worship a feathered and frilled grandee, And e'er on his gorgeous A.D.C. The "nicest" are ready to beam. His boots were tight, And his hat was bright, And his tie was a fantasee; And the wealthiest girls - Society's pearls - Just loved his refulgency.
He strolled in the wake of the high grandee In his glittering uniform; At frivols and functions and afternoon tea He lolled with a manner so easy and free That he took the girls by storm. And he wooed a maid Of the sheep brigade, One of the squatocracee, With a station Outback And a house at Toorak, And they wedded right merrilee.
Now Percival Gregory Grandison-Lee In his London club doth dwell; He squats at his ease through a deputee That idle and valueless absentee, And says that this land is Hell; But once every year For the Cup he's here, As the master of Bungabaree; Our well-equipped courses And galloping horses Are all that appeal to Lee.

The Bulletin, 23 May 1912, p5

Copyright © Perry Middlemiss 2002-03